Prayer is not one of those things we can do without. Prayer is as vital as breathing; prayer is as necessary as brushing our teeth. The day a person stops breathing, the heart stops beating, and the body organs begin to fail. When we stop praying, our connection to God, the source of life and power, is cut off, and different aspects of our lives begin to shut down and fail. Prayerlessness can weaken and crumble every area of our lives.
Just like breathing and brushing our teeth are not optional, prayer is not an option! Prayer is a necessity for everyday life, a necessity for everyone that wants to survive the times we live in. No doubt about it, prayer is a channel through which we receive good things from God, like financial blessings, a spouse, child, job, promotion, etc. Jesus Himself encourages us to ask for things when we pray when He says, “Ask, and you will receive” (Matthew 7:7), but that isn’t the main and primary purpose of prayer.
Prayer is first and foremost the place where we develop closeness and intimacy with God. What’s more important than our relationship with God? Is it a comfortable life, record-breaking success in our career and business, an unending flow of financial blessings, good health, good family relationships, and good friends? These are all great things to desire and have, but they all pale into insignificance compared to the joy of knowing God and being acknowledged by God as one of His close friends.
In Isaiah 41:8, God referred to Abraham as His friend. Abraham is also called a friend of God in James 2:23. If God were to describe your relationship with Him, would He call you a close friend or an acquaintance? Are you an acquaintance; someone that talks to God every now and then? Someone that knows a little bit about God from what you’ve heard in church, from people close to you, or from the internet, but between you and God, there’s no real attachment or connection; there’s nothing special between you and God. Or would God call you a fair-weather friend, someone that God only gets to see or hear from when circumstances are pleasant and convenient for you or when you need God to give you something or do something for you?
God’s desire is for us to be close, bosom friends with Him. To be a people who daily draw near to Him, and He, in turn, draws near to us. To be a people who abide; who dwell consistently and continually in His presence (James 4:8, John 15:4, Rev. 3:20). God wants us to be a people who have such a strong bond with Him that no person, demon, or situation can break (Romans 8:38-39). In the Bible, when describing our relationship with God, God uses the most intimate kind of relationship that can exist between two people—the marriage relationship. We are the bride of Christ (Eph. 5:25, Rev. 21:2).
Couples don’t become close just because a pastor pronounced them as husband and wife on their wedding day. It takes much more than that. There must be a deliberate and intentional effort on the part of both spouses to maintain regular and honest communication with one another. Which is actually what prayer is—regular, open, and honest communication with God, making God your Number 1 Confidant; the person who knows all your needs, fears, pains, struggles, and heartbreaks.
Anyone that wants to move from the level of being an acquaintance or a fair-weather friend to an intimate friend of God must move from the level of just asking for a visa, examination success, life-partner, house, or good job to having candid, frank, deep, intimate conversations with God. What does an intimate conversation with God look like? How is it different from merely asking God for things? Is it about never missing your morning devotion and church prayer programs? Being religious doesn’t equate to a close relationship with God.
The Pharisees adhered to many religious dos and don’ts; they were involved in a variety of religious activities, but their hearts were far from God. Jesus said concerning them, “These people honour me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me” (Matthew 15:8). May it not be said concerning our prayer lives that we say all the right things with our lips, but our hearts are far from God. The Pharisees prayed, like many people today do, but they never bothered to listen and obey.
It can be very frustrating to have a spouse who doesn’t listen. In such a situation, you feel like your opinion doesn’t matter, your suggestions are unimportant. You feel detached from your spouse and undervalued. Not listening can lead to misunderstanding and conflicts in a marriage. Intimacy, whether with God or a spouse, can never be built by monologue conversations, where it is only one voice that is heard, only one voice that dominates the conversations. Praying regularly but listening occasionally or not at all is merely being religious.
The end goal of prayer is to bring us under the guidance and leadership of God. It is to become a people who are led by God. Prayer is not an exclusive right of Christians. Many people of different religions pray, but not many are led and directed by a Living God. And it is being led by God that sets us apart as God’s own and from people of other religions. Romans 8:14 says, “For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are the sons of God.” We have crossed over from monologue conversations to dialogue, from one-sided conversations to active listening, from a shallow or distant relationship to a deeper, meaningful connection with God when we become a people that are led by God at all times and in all things.
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